So. Life took me for a ride.

I can't really explain why I bought this service back after months and months of it being billed to an expired credit card. I guess because after a conversation I had with my cousin, I realized that if someone I was reading disappeared, I'd want to know why.

So here's why.

I lived my life. I loved my two little boys with the fire of a thousand suns, with conviction and without equivocation. I worked my job, I tended my marriage...I just enjoyed every little bit of my life.

And then, in February...my beautiful, funny, life-enthusiastic, sweet, amazing baby got sick. He had an ear infection, which from Friday to Monday turned to what we were told was severe dehydration.

On Monday, February 8th, in the morning, we were in the pediatrician's office. On that same Monday night, we were at Children's Hospital of Philadelphia.

On Wednesday, February 10th, my son Maxwell was diagnosed with bacterial meningitis.

On February 11th, we determined that he had no further brain function.

On February 12th, he died.

And my life has fallen to pieces since then.

So there's where life took me. And here I am. I don't know where here is, but if there's anyone here with me, stick around, please. I'm going to document all the pictures and smiles and stories I should have been documenting all along, because they need to be remembered, and more people need to know my Maxy Bear.

Comments

[megan]

There are no words. I'm SO, SO sorry that this happened. If it helps, there are still people in this crazy Internet place still rooting for you, including me. *HUGS*

[Denora Carpenter]

I'd often wondered where you'd disappeared to, and hoped that you were just loving life and enjoying your boys. Words cannot express how sorry I am for your loss. I hope posting stories and pictures here will help you heal.

[TiA]

Oh Kate... oh honey. Nothing I say can take away all the pain you're feeling. Please know that I am so so sorry that this happened to you and your family. My heart aches and goes out to you. Please continue to write and bless us with your memories of your precious boy. If ever you need to talk, email me.

[Hope]

Oh no, I'm so sorry! I had definitely noticed your absence, but I assumed that it was because you were busy enjoying your mommyhood. I'm so sorry that's not the case. :(

I am so, so, so sorry for your loss.